Looking Out the Well

Silence as a writer builds up. As it builds up, its paralyzing. The last two years have made it worse. Even though I felt things welling up inside me to write, I stayed silent. I was scared, and there were voices that were already saying what I was feeling. So, I figured I didn’t need to just be another voice. I could just listen and be encouraged that someone else was stepping up to the plate. In some ways, I was content to watch from the sidelines. However, I still felt like my silence was somehow wrong.

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Recovery in Covid-19

This is a strange time for many of us. While previous generations have lived through times like these before, its new for much of us. It is something that we didn’t plan for. Social distancing does come with some sacrifices. In-person meetings for almost everyone are not possible right now. This can be a struggle, especially for those who have been or are in recovery. As our anxiety and feelings of isolation ramp up so does the temptation to cope in unhealthy ways.

There are a couple of things that help me during this time. The first thing is the realization that sobriety isn’t something that I achieved on my own. Sobriety is a gift from God. When we pursue and take care of our relationship with God, then we can achieve and maintain sobriety. When we accept God’s love and acceptance, that’s when we can achieve and maintain sobriety. You may disagree, but I believe the bulk of the work of recovery is done by God. It is not through our own power that we become free from addictive behaviors and unhealthy coping mechanisms. It is through God.

Second, losing sobriety doesn’t disqualify us from God’s love. Giving into those unhealthy coping mechanisms will bring consequences, but the price has been paid and work has been done. Paul wrote to the Romans:

‘Therefore there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus. For the law of the Spirit of life in Christ Jesus has set you free from the law of sin and of death. For what the Law could not do, weak as it was through the flesh, God did: sending His own Son in the likeness of sinful flesh and as an offering for sin, He condemned sin in the flesh, so that the requirement of the Law might be fulfilled in us, who do not walk according to the flesh but according to the Spirit. ‘

Romans 8:1-4 NASB
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If we lose sobriety during this time, we are faced with the same choice we’ve always been faced with. Do we live in shame, or do we turn back to God? Do we try to hide it, or do we pick up the phone to call our sponsors (mentors) and accountability partners? Do we continue trying to seek things through “the flesh” (in our own power), or do we surrender to the Spirit of Jesus who gave Himself up for us? When we hear God coming around the corner, we can hide in the bushes or in humility say, “Here I am!”

This isn’t to minimize the damage that this time can cause. Not only can sobriety be more difficult to maintain, but online meetings present their own challenges. Zoom bombing has been in the news, and church and recovery communities are prime targets. Zoom codes aren’t hard to guess, and it can be triggering to have a stranger interrupt a session with vulgarities and graphic pictures. Thankfully, there are ways to mitigate this through password and meeting room features.

Isn’t that what part of what the work of recovery is? Action plans to have when we are triggered are mitigation strategies to keep us safe. Internalizing Scripture and God’s love for us will help us feel safe to return to Him if we should fall. God’s love and Truth protects us from the condemnation of sin and shame.

If you’ve lost sobriety during this time, you can turn back to God. He is waiting for you. Refuse to let sin and shame have the final word in your life. Cling to the truth that Jesus’ sacrifice and resurrection was enough to cover you and turn toward Him. He is the Great Rescuer! Come up with a plan for if you are triggered again. If you find yourself at a loss for ideas, reach out to those around you. Do some research on what others are doing. Use this as a training opportunity. Sometimes, God leads us through times like these to grow our trust and dependence on Him.

If you feel like you’re hanging by a thread, then keep hanging on and moving towards God. If you feel like you’ve made some real strides during this time, that is awesome! Celebrate that, because this is a new and hard time for many of us. Don’t take any victory for granted.

Above all, remember God loves you and wants you. Nothing you can do will ever change that.

God, Grant Me Serenity – A Way to Happy

God, grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change,
the courage to change the things I can,
and the wisdom to know the difference.
Living one day at a time,
enjoying one moment at a time;
accepting hardship as a pathway to peace;
taking, as Jesus did,
this sinful world as it is,
not as I would have it;
trusting that You will make all things right
if I surrender to Your will;
so that I may be reasonable happy in this life
and supremely happy with You forever in the next.


Amen

Joy is kind of a funny thing. Joy and happiness often get divorced in Christian circles. One of the signs of spiritual maturity is to maintain joy throughout the tough seasons of life. I know some may disagree with me, but joy has been perhaps a little too separated from happiness.

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God, Grant Me Serenity – One Day at a Time

God, grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change,
the courage to change the things I can,
and the wisdom to know the difference.
Living one day at a time,
enjoying one moment at a time;

Have you ever had a day where your schedule was so packed that you looked toward that day with a sense of dread? Have you ever woke up and felt a pit in your stomach and asked, “How in the world am I going to get everything I need to get done today, done?” Have you ever had the type of week where you said to yourself, “I can’t wait for Friday to get here!”

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God, Grant Me Serenity – Wisdom

“God, grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change,
the courage to change the things I can,
and the wisdom to know the difference.”

If you have been reading this series, you can probably see where we are headed now. The next piece of the serenity prayer I’m going to write about is wisdom. If there are changes  we have a choice in and changes we don’t, then we need to be able to discern which is which. What do we have control over? What do we not?

I can tell you one thing, I do not have control over when my WordPress app glitches on my phone and posts something before it is ready. I’m sorry about that.

Wisdom is not just knowledge. Cold, hard knowledge that we shouldn’t do something doesn’t lead to us actually avoiding it. Knowledge is simply fact gathering. A+B = C. Wisdom, on the other hand asks, “What do I do now that I know A+B=C?”

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God, Grant Me Serenity – Courage

God, grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change,
the courage to change the things I can,

In the previous post, I wrote that change is a scary thing. It can be exciting or terrifying. It can fill us with anticipation or anxiety. Some change we have a choice in, while others come upon us whether we like it or not. The change we have a choice in requires us to have courage.

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